I had to stop linking every single thing that happened to me with Kennedy. Realization dawned then, that he was still my default. Over the past three years, we’d become each other’s habit. And though he’d broken his habit of me when he walked away, I’d not broken my habit of him. I was still tethering him to my present, to my future. The truth was, he now belonged only to my past, and it was time I began to accept it, as much as it hurt to do so.

I thought about texting Lucas, but what would i say? That I'd tossed and turned all night, thinking of his hands on me?

Say stop, whenever you want to stop. Understand?" I nodded. "Do you want to stop now?" My head moved back and forth to the pillow. "Thank God.

there's not a boy on the planet worth this amount of angst. I know; i used to be one

I’ve come to ask how you do it. How you feel what I know you’re feeling and then walk away like that.

Lucas was fifteen minutes late to class on Friday, and we had a pop quiz first thing - which he missed. My first thought was how irresponsible it was to miss a quiz… and then I remembered that I missed the midterm. I couldn't exactly point any fingers.

But just because you’re strong and resilient doesn’t mean you never need someone to be there for you, to take care of you.