I don't care if it's Bruno Mars or Aerosmith or ZZ Top... it's about songs. 'Paperback Writer,' 'Satisfaction,' 'Cat Scratch Fever,' 'Walk This Way,' all the killer songs in the world start with an identifiable guitar pattern that is basically a bastardization of either honky-tonk or boogie-woogie. And that's in every cool piece of music in the world that you and I love.

So listen everybody to what I got to say, there's hope for tomorrow, if we wake up today.

I have undeniable evidence that many have awakened as a result of my raising hell. Raising hell is SO American rock-and-roll. And of course even soulless wimps love killer music and my incredible guitar tone.

I'd like to have James Brown as my singer. I already have the best drummer, Tommy Clufetos. I've jammed a bunch with John Entwistle, and it was like a musical orgy. That guy is a living, breathing, grunting rhythm. For horns, let's go with the Stax/Volt guys, and I'm going to have Steve Cropper on standby just in case I want a rhythm guitarist.

Do you want to feel good, or do you want to do good?

If we want our bodies to be healthier, we need to get off the salmonella, e-coli, mad cow, assembly-line toxic hell train! God I love that statement. What did I just say?

Mr. Janet Reno? I think Mr. Janet Reno... I think he's one of the best hunting dogs in the world.