I think I would like to go into modelling. Of course, I don't know how to do it, and wouldn't be any good at it if I did, so I'm going to employ someone to walk the catwalks on my behalf. It would still be me, of course.

Granny was an old-fashioned witch. She didn’t do good for people, she did right by them.

There are no inconsistencies in the Discworld books; ocassionally, however, there are alternate pasts.

If you trust in yourself. . .and believe in your dreams. . .and follow your star. . . you'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren't so lazy.

It's the end game that people dread and that's what I'm scared of

I'm mean and turf and I'm mean and turf and I'm mean and turf and I'm mean and turf, And me an' my friends can walk towards you with our hats on backwards in a menacing way, Yo!

Always remember that the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading. People like a show.