Only if you first seek inner forgiveness will your confrontation be temperate, wise, and gracious. Only when you have lost the need to see the other person hurt will you have any chance of actually bringing about change, reconciliation, and healing. You have to submit to the costly suffering and death of forgiveness if there is going to be any resurrection.
Timothy KellerWhile Christianity was able to agree with pagan writers that inordinate attachment to earthly goods can lead to unnecessary pain and grief, it also taught that the answer to this was not to love things less but to love God more than anything else. Only when our greatest love is God, a love that we cannot lose even in death, can we face all things with peace. Grief was not to be eliminated but seasoned and buoyed up with love and hope.
Timothy KellerWhen you listen and read one thinker, you become a cloneโฆ two thinkers, you become confusedโฆ ten thinkers, youโll begin developing your own voiceโฆ two or three hundred thinkers, you become wise and develop your voice.
Timothy Keller