As a kid, when I got to the edge of a cliff I wanted to jump off. I didn't want to kill myself. I wanted to fly.

When I was about 7 years old, I had been labeled dyslexic. I'd try to concentrate on what I was reading, then I'd get to the end of the page and have very little memory of anything I'd read. I would go blank, feel anxious, nervous, bored, frustrated, dumb. I would get angry. My legs would actually hurt when I was studying. My head ached. All through school and well into my career, I felt like I had a secret. When I'd go to a new school, I wouldn't want the other kids to know about my learning disability, but then I'd be sent off to remedial reading.

Emotions kick up. You try not to kick things up, but you go through things you can't help.

But I think also you look at Scientology it is the fastest growing religion. It's helped so many people.

I feel good about the fact that I finally found something I love. I never lived in one place for very long - that's the way my whole life has been. I was always packing and moving around, staying in Canada, Kentucky, Jersey, St. Louis - it all helped because I was always learning new accents, experiencing different environments.

Today, people can say anything they want. Suddenly it gets in the rumor mill and then it evolves and then somehow it becomes fact and you say, What is this? You know, why don't you ask me?

I also realise power is fleeting, it doesn't last forever in this career, so I want to make the most of it. I want to make the kinds of pictures that interest me, it's as simple as that. I've never done work for money ever. If your choices are based on grosses and the film doesn't do well, what does that mean? It leaves you with nothing.