I've masturbated like 5 times in the last 24 hours... it hurts... it's going to fall off.

If I had my own world I'd build you an empire from here to the far lands to spread love like violence!

I'll eat a nugget of my own poop for 20 bucks. I'll pay you 20 bucks and I'll eat it.

Spending so much time on the road, I get to fart all the time. Then when it's, like, Thanksgiving dinner and I'm sitting with my grandmother, I can't fart for, like, two hours.

All I can say is hold on, and prepare.

I think dreams hold a lot of meaning. I believe that if the universe is truthfully infinite then there are infinite possibilities for dreams to be happening somewhere out there.

I was kicked out of middle school a few times. This guy who was kind of a d*** and a bully got hit by a car. I jumped up and went, YEAH Apparently that wasnt cool with some people cause I got kicked out.