Most secrets should never be told, but especially those that are more menacing to the listener than to the teller.

I believe more in the scissors than I do in the pencil.

Life is difficult enough without Meryl Streep movies.

All literature is gossip.

It should take you about four seconds to walk from here to the door. I'll give you two.

Leave it to me: I'm always top banana in the shock department.

I just live one day at a time. That's my new theory in life.