Fighting for survival in a shattered world... the truth is her only hope.

I have to face the fear. I have to take control of the situation and find a way to make it less frightening.

I tell myself, as sternly as possible, that is how things work here. We do dangerous things and people die. People die, and we move on to the next dangerous thing. The sooner that lesson sinks in, the better chance I have at surviving initiation.

My problem might be that even if I did go home, I wouldn’t belong there, among people who give without thinking and care without trying.

Caleb runs up to me and folds me carefully in his arms. I breathe a sigh of relief. I thought I had gotten to the point where I didn’t need my brother anymore, but I don’t think such a point actually exists.

Sometimes I see him as just another person, and sometimes I feel the sight of him in my gut, like a deep ache.

Maybe it's a little depressing to think that my vision of a perfect world is actually so messed up, but I think it means that I don't really understand what 'perfect' is.