Know that the secret of the arts is to correct nature.

Inspiration: A peculiar effect of divine flatulence emitted by the Holy Spirit which hisses into the ears of a few chosen of God.

But for what purpose was the earth formed?" asked Candide. "To drive us mad," replied Martin.

The instinct of a man is to pursue everything that flies from him, and to fly from all that pursue him.

Dogs, monkeys, and parrots are a thousand times less miserable than we are.

Let us meet four times a year in a grand temple with music, and thank God for all his gifts. There is one sun. There is one God. Let us have one religion. Then all mankind will be brethren.

If there are atheists, who is to be blamed if not the mercenary tyrants of souls who, in revolting us against their swindles, compel some feeble spirits to deny the God whom these monsters dishonour?