I have lived eighty years of life and know nothing for it, but to be resigned and tell myself that flies are born to be eaten by spiders and man to be devoured by sorrow.

History is fables agreed upon.

What is history? The lie that everyone agrees on.

The road to the heart is the ear

Animals have these advantages over man: they never hear the clock strike, they die without any idea of death, they have no theologians to instruct them, their last moments are not disturbed by unwelcome and unpleasant ceremonies, their funerals cost them nothing, and no one starts lawsuits over their wills.

Fear could never make virtue.

I advise you to go on living solely to enrage those who are paying your annuities. It is the only pleasure I have left.