Never pass up the chance to sit down or go to the bathroom.

I cannot pretend to be impartial about the colours. I rejoice with the brilliant ones, and am genuinely sorry for the poor browns.

The American Constitution declares 'All men are born equal.' The British Socialist Party add: 'All men must be kept equal'.

The British people are good all through. You can test them as you would put a bucket into the sea and always find it salt.

Two nations divided by a common language.

To each there comes in their lifetime a special moment when they are figuratively tapped on the shoulder and offered the chance to do a very special thing, unique to them and fitted to their talents. What a tragedy if that moment finds them unprepared or unqualified for that which could have been their finest hour.

I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.