I thought [when I was 16] my days were just going to be spent hanging out on a beach and my girlfriend was going to be Miss Teen USA and my best friend will be a dolphin.

I don't want to tell people what they should think.

If you don't acknowledge differences, it's as bad as stereotyping or reducing someone.

I think you had the GOP down there in North Carolina reaching out to African-American voters and this guy coming on television and using the N-word and saying what Don Yelton said.

The Daily Show writers are incredibly smart and very well plugged-in but occasionally they would need me for certain specific things, and I'd be like, 'Yeah, I completely know how to do that; I can solve that problem,and then I'd be like, 'Mom?

I've always said I'm the worst representative of Muslim-Americans that's ever existed, because I've been inside more bars than mosques.

I know the Gospel according to Mark better than I know any sura in the Quran.