Why don't I drink from a straw? Because straws are for suckers.

The president is the cube of ice one places in the pot of a houseplant, providing a steady amount of nourishment over the course of a hot day. A good description of the job and also a fantastic bit of practical household advice.

I do the very best I know how - the very best I can; and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.

When I lay down the reins of this administration, I want to have one friend left. And that friend is myself.

A child is a person who is going to carry on what you have started ... He will assume control of your cities, states and nations. He is going to move in and take over your churches, schools, universities, and corporations ... The fate of humanity is in his hands.

When I so pressingly urge a strict observance of all the laws, let me not be understood as saying there are no bad laws, nor that grievances may not arise, for the redress of which, no legal provisions have been made. I mean to say no such thing. But I do mean to say, that, although bad laws, if they exist, should be repealed as soon as possible, still while they continue in force, for the sake of example, they should be religiously observed.

No man is good enough to govern another man without the other's consent.