Shaq is Shaq. I did an episode of The Soup with Shaq, and he shook my hand, and I felt like I was a Ken doll, like I had no hand.

Gratitude is the attitude. That's the thing.

When Lollapalooza started, and I was really into Red Hot Chili Peppers and Jane's Addiction, Soundgarden. I went to that Lollapalooza tour twice, I think.

I sponsored every team in the Park Slope Little League for years.I sponsor two soccer teams in England, one of which is called Broadley F.C. A kid wrote to me through Facebook because they started a team in honor of their friend who died of leukemia, and he played in the band of this very obscure team in England.

My mom always says, "Pack your smile," but [the sound guy] articulated it beautifully, because he saw me go from Joe Schmo who had been on food stamps to Adam Richman from Man V. Food. He said, "For you, it may be your 50th or 100th selfie, autograph, or whatever of the day. But for that person, it may be the first or the only time in their life that they've seen someone they enjoy on television. Never lose sight of that."

If I had Sirius FM and fire-breathing in a giant puppy dragon, I'd be golden.

I lived in San Jose for a little bit, and one of my neighbors was Vietnamese and was teasing me. I said "I've had pho," and then he goes, "Oh, what do you get, the number one big bowl?" I was like, "Come on, man. You don't have to come at me like that." But yeah, I've tried tendon. Tendon eventually yields.