When we give children advice or instant solutions, we deprive them of the experience that comes from wrestling with their own problems.
Adele FaberComforters for our todays / Guardians of memories / Keeping our youth and yesterdays alive / Comrades with one history.
Adele FaberThe mere existence of an additional child or children in the family could signify Less. Less time alone with parents. Less attention for hurts and disappointments. Less approval for accomplishments. . . . No wonder children struggle so fiercely to be first or best. No wonder they mobilize all their energy to have more or most. Or better still, all.
Adele FaberNo one cares / who is better / who is worse / who has more / who has less. / Content in our connectedness / we are brothers and sisters / after all.
Adele FaberDeep inside you know / when trouble comes / and there's no one else to turn to / you can call on each other / and count on each other ... / because each other / is all you have.
Adele FaberFrom their struggles to establish dominance over each other, siblings become tougher and more resilient. From their endless rough-housing with each other, they develop speed and agility. From their verbal sparring they learn the difference between being clever and being hurtful. From the normal irritations of living together, they learn how to assert themselves, defend themselves, compromise. And sometimes, from their envy of each other's special abilities they become inspired to work harder, persist and achieve.
Adele Faber