Neatness of phrase is so closely akin to wit that it is often accepted as its substitute.

Philadelphians are every whit as mediocre as their neighbors, but they seldom encourage each other in mediocrity by giving it a more agreeable name.

It has been wisely said that we cannot really love anybody at whom we never laugh.

It is not the office of a novelist to show us how to behave ourselves; it is not the business of fiction to teach us anything.

The man who never tells an unpalatable truth 'at the wrong time' (the right time has yet to be discovered) is the man whose success in life is fairly well assured.

There is nothing in the world so incomprehensible as the joke we do not see.

if a man be discreet enough to take to hard drinking in his youth, before his general emptiness is ascertained, his friends invariably credit him with a host of shining qualities which, we are given to understand, lie balked and frustrated by his one unfortunate weakness.