Am I going to complain about being typecast as smart? I don't think so.

Marriage is a mystery and part of it is just being kind to each other, not being selfish.

Marriage isn't a carnival ride.

I talk to grown-ups who are out to have a good time and they want to be spoken to in a different way. I don't want to be pandered to, so I try not to pander.

I don't know if I was always an open person, but I think stand-up comics specifically have this way of running towards embarrassing things - whereas regular people tend to run away - because the embarrassing story is always going to be the really funny story.

I'm such a geek, and have always been a real nerd.

I'm my own boss and my boss is a total ass.