If I put myself on the ballot and even 50 people voted for me, it'd be a travesty.

My dad loved comedians, especially George Jessel, and he loved Henny Youngman and Buddy Hackett.

I don't know what happens to you after you die. I'm not banking on there being, like, a heaven.

If you want a free email service that doesn’t use your words to target ads to you, you’ll have to figure out how to port years and years of Gmail messages somewhere else, which is about as easy as developing your own free email service.

I think if you're going to do a movie about Reagan, you do it about the fact that he created the huge deficit, that he armed the Mujahideen, that he armed Saddam, that he armed Iran, that he armed two-thirds of the Axis of Evil, and that he funded terrorists in Central America. He was, in my mind, a terrible president.

Liberals don't hate America. We love America more than Ann Coulter does. I love it enough to engage my readers honestly.

If you use Facebook - as I do - Facebook in all likelihood has a unique digital file of your face, one that can be as accurate as a fingerprint and that can be used to identify you in a photo of a large crowd.