Everything that Bush touches turns to manure in public policy.

I remember during my lifetime I would meet women, and it was almost like God would say to me, 'Now, this woman here is not the one you are going to end up with, but she is going to be a lot like this woman; look at this woman, study this woman.' And when my wife showed up, He was like, 'You recognize her now?'

When I am sitting home, and I am happy and I have my TV show and I don't need to work and I'm married now and I like to be in line by my pool with my yoga instructor wife and eating fruit and taking in the sun, then life is good.

Rolling torture wagons for nature's most dignified creature.

The leadership class of the Republican Party is a conservative Christian loony bin. The leadership of the Republican Party are a bunch of sociopathic maniacs who have their lips super-glued to the ass of the conservative right.

I don't think I really have a talent for movie acting.

Only one thing counts in this life - get them to sign on the line that is dotted.