Smoking is similar to hitting yourself over the head with a hammer because, when you stop, you feel better

Marriages are more likely to fail when one partner not only does not mirror the other's expressions of happiness, but instead shows expressions of contempt.

We prefer to find mates who are roughly as attractive as we are, which means they are more likely to stay and not look for a better offer.

We are different because our brain is wired differently. This causes us to perceive the world in different ways and have different values and priorities. Not better or worse - different.

A three-year old was examining his testicles while taking a bath. 'Mom,' he asked,'are these my brains?' 'Not yet.' she replied.

A real man would never cry in public unless he was watching a movie in which a heroic dog died to save its master.Or if Heidi klum unbuttoned her blouse. Or he accidently dropped a full case of beer.

The simplest way to customize is to phone members of the audience in advance and ask them what they expect from your session and why they expect it. Then use their quotes throughout your presentation.