The simplest way to customize is to phone members of the audience in advance and ask them what they expect from your session and why they expect it. Then use their quotes throughout your presentation.

A three-year old was examining his testicles while taking a bath. 'Mom,' he asked,'are these my brains?' 'Not yet.' she replied.

A real man would never cry in public unless he was watching a movie in which a heroic dog died to save its master.Or if Heidi klum unbuttoned her blouse. Or he accidently dropped a full case of beer.

Brain surgeons earn 10 times that of a general practitioner... it pays to be an expert.

Smoking is similar to hitting yourself over the head with a hammer because, when you stop, you feel better

The simplest way to customize is to phone members of the audience in advance and ask them what they expect from your session and why they expect it. Then use their quotes throughout your presentation.

We prefer to find mates who are roughly as attractive as we are, which means they are more likely to stay and not look for a better offer.