KISS, n. A word invented by the poets as a rhyme for "bliss." It is supposed to signify, in a general way, some kind of rite or ceremony appertaining to a good understanding; but the manner of its performance is unknown to this lexicographer.

ORTHODOX, n. An ox wearing the popular religious joke.

Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.

The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forebearance among men.

NOUMENON, n. That which exists, as distinguished from that which merely seems to exist, the latter being a phenomenon. The noumenon is a bit difficult to locate; it can be apprehended only by a process of reasoning - which is a phenomenon.

For every man there is something in the vocabulary that would stick to him like a second skin. His enemies have only to find it.

Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.