Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.

Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.

NEWTONIAN, Pertaining to a philosophy of the universe invented by Newton, who discovered that an apple will fall to the ground, but was unable to say why. His successors and disciples have advanced so far as to be able to say when.

LEXICOGRAPHER, n. A pestilent fellow who, under the pretense of recording some particular stage in the development of a language, does what he can to arrest its growth, stiffen its flexibility and mechanize its methods.

Scriptures - The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.

Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.