I'm gonna do the whole bedroom in camel color - it's an old lady color.

I like people who would rather something be discovered than shoved in your face.

If you cannot come to the party, do not cancel at the last minute or give a message to a child to inform the host. And don't bother explaining why you can't attend because anything after 'because' is bullshit.

I was just a kid. I think I stole a candy bar. I remember feeling so terrible. It was the worst shock. I was probably 7. That's my least favorite feeling: guilt.

Gift-wrap the framed artwork on your walls and rehang them - what's nicer than a wall of presents to look at?

I'm not very good with drink recipes. If I'm entertaining, I like to come up with a house drink for the evening, one thing I'll make for the whole evening of the whole month.

Begin your story with a sentence that will immediately grab hold of your listener's ears like a surly nun in a Catholic school.