Shanghainese people are good negotiators, they're very persistent, and you grow up in an atmosphere like that - very competitive. That becomes part of your personality, Shanghai personality becomes part of yours.

We are lost, she and I, unseen and not seeing, unheard and not hearing, unknown by others.

I won't be what I'm not. -Jing-mei

I wanted my children to have the best combination: American circumstances and Chinese character. How could I know these things do not mix?

I used to think that my mother got into arguments with people because they didn't understand her English, because she was Chinese.

You can get sucked into the idea that, 'Gosh, this is impressive. Maybe I should do this. It will look good.' Or 'I'll write like this because it will impress that critic.'

My mother had a very difficult childhood, having seen her own mother kill herself. So she didnt always know how to be the nurturing mother that we all expect we should have.