Sure, you can do without the hard personal comments, but it doesn't really happen apart from a few isolated incidents.

I'm ugly, I'm overweight, but I'm happy

In the past five weeks I've trained hard, trying to get my ankle back to where I want it to be

If I'm playing well I'll get through a bat in three weeks. I batter them.

That means I can drive a flock of sheep through the town centre, drink for free in no less than 64 pubs and get a lift home with the police when I become inebriated. What more could you want?

I'm not too good with packing. I always have every intention of doing it the week before and then leave it until the last moment - but at least I do it myself, I don't leave it to the missus.

When it comes to sledging, I think people often get the wrong view.