One recent menu for suspected terrorists at Guantanamo consisted of orange glazed chicken, fresh fruit crepe, steamed peas and mushrooms, and rice pilaf. Sounds like the sort of thing you'd get at Windows on the World - if it still existed.

Because of all our presidents, Barack Obama is the one most likely to be descended from a slave trader, since Kenya had a major slave-trading port, and the Muslims were heavily involved in the slave trade.

Here's a foolproof method for keeping America safe. Always do the exact 180-degree opposite of whatever [Jimmy] Carter says, as quickly as possible.

The fact that a Republican is in the late Senator Kennedy's old seat probably must have him rolling in his grave, probably spilling his drink.

Moderation in the defense of liberty is no virtue.

Don't make the mistake, America, of voting for Barack Obama who, by the way, does not come out of the American black experience and everything white Americans feel guilty about. He's a Hawaiian born in 1961.

You will find liberals always rooting for savages against civilization.