I like to think of myself less like 'an adult' and more like a 'former fetus.'

Every time I talk to a fancy journalist and they ask what I do in my free time my scumbag brain goes 'say masturbate, it'll be hilarious'.

I’ve never felt like I’ve exactly traded on my looks. When I was a teenager, I was an ultra-late bloomer, and my mom would say it was a blessing, because it means you never have to wonder if guys are only interested in you because you’ve got boobs. I would have been thrilled if guys were interested in me because of my boobs! Similarly, I think I’m lucky that I’ve never had a crisis about whether the only reason I’m successful is because I’m crazy hot. It’s not something that crosses my mind.

Nobody pulls a prank like George Clooney.

For people whose job it is to make sure we make money, there's a lot of pressure.

Can we drop the pretense of Presidents Day and just call it I needed a long weekend because Valentines Day is garbage

The consummate gentleman on the planet today is George Clooney, who never fails to go the extra mile for people. Every person matters to George.