Avoidance behavior is a response designed to protect the infant from behavioral disorganization. If we transfer this concept to adult life, we can see that an avoidant infant might very well develop into a person whose principal need was to find some kind of meaning and order in life which was not entirely, or even chiefly, dependent upon interpersonal relationships
Anthony StorrIt is only when we no longer compulsively need someone that we can have a real relationship with them.
Anthony StorrIt is a tragic paradox that the very qualities that have led to man's extraordinary capacity for success are also those most likely to destroy him.
Anthony StorrThe word "jealousy" is often used as if it were synonymous with envy; but I think the distinction worth preserving. Jealousy is predominantly concerned with the fear of loss of something one possesses, envy with the wish to own something another possesses. Othello suffers from the fear that he has lost Desdemona's love. Iago suffers from envy of the position held by Cassio, to which he feels entitled.
Anthony Storr