Strange how much simple wisdom there is to be found in the deformed head and unprepossessing carcase of your typical London cabbie.

An unemployed electrician,whom I had been taunting with my reminder of how much richer I was, leaned forward and said:'What are your qualifications? I know exactly what your qualifications are.You bent over in the shower to pick up some soap at Eton and Harrow, like all the rest of them.

Anyone wishing to communicate with Americans should do so by e-mail, which has been specially invented for the purpose, involving neither physical proximity nor speech.

Better to go than sit around being a terrible old bore.

History, having destroyed the religion as the opium of the people, now requires that they be given a taste of the real stuff.

Unless people are prepared to declare themselves your enemies you have to hunt around for them.

There are many Welsh who are taciturn, truthful, well formed, open minded, handsome and peaceful, even if no particular individual immediately springs to mind.