[On being indecisive and changeable:] On my gravestone I want inscribed: 'On the other hand, maybe I should have lived.

A good laugh makes any interview, or any conversation, so much better.

The origin of a modern party is anthropological: humans meet and share food to lower hostility between them and indicate friendship.

Children are God's way of punishing us for having sex.

[President Obama] made so many promises. We thought that he was going to be -- I shouldn't say this at Christmastime -- but the next messiah.

Success can make you go one of two ways. It can make you a prima donna - or it can smooth the edges, take away the insecurities, let the nice things come out.

I was the kind nobody thought could make it. I had a funny Boston accent. I couldn't pronounce my R's. I wasn't a beauty.