I've always said we got married because there was nothing on TV.

Honey, I can smell the scent of another woman from 500 paces.

GOD is watching us, from a Distance.

Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your soul to bleed.

Thank God for the gays. I don't know what would have happened but I know what did happen. Good for them and good for me.

Just because people don't meet you doesn't mean they're not out there breaking their asses trying to get around.

When I turned 50, I threw myself a big birthday party, and I looked seriously at what my life has been about. I recommend this to everybody. Ask yourself, "What have I done? How did I do it? Where'd I mess up? Where did I do well?" When I did this assessment of my life, I said to myself, "It was really good." I made a lot of people laugh, made a lot of people cry in a good way, brought a lot of joy to people, picked up a lot of garbage. And in all those years, I saw a lot. I went to foreign lands. I met interesting people. And I got it!