When you have a steady job you're more inspired to broaden yourself.

I have my standards. They're low, but I have them.

I decided years ago not to read stories about myself anymore. Each one is a potential minefield: Whatever it says, you're bound to take it the wrong way. Why do it if you know it's going to make you miserable?

I wish America would spend even half as much time complaining about plastics in our oceans as we do about actresses' plastic surgery.

Just because people don't meet you doesn't mean they're not out there breaking their asses trying to get around.

The inventor of the modern foundation garment that we women wear today was a German scientist and opera lover by the name of Otto Titsling.

Do I understand this right? I'm being marked down?