Gold diggers are the wife beaters of men!

Only an adult with dying dreams can appreciate how awesome it is to have a dog.

When I watch 'Breaking Bad,' my stomach is in knots.

I have fun doing movies, I’ve had fun doing the animated show, and I certainly have fun doing standup. Even that, even though it’s just me talking, it’s also interaction with the crowd.

I was certified to take x-rays, but you can't just show up and start cleaning people's teeth.

I bet The Walking Dead gets really low ratings out in Montana, just because all they need to do is look out their f-king window, am I right?

If you're away from your house for a month, by the time you come back there's someone else living in it.