I was the fattest baby in Clark County, Arkansas. They put me in the newspaper. It was like a prize turnip.

My songs aren't built around choruses or hooks or anything like that. That's kind of how I write screenplays too.

I've never heard of anybody smoking a joint and going on a rampage. It makes you lie around on the floor and look at the ceiling. What's wrong with that?

I'm not really a guy who wants to be a director, anyway.

Just the other day, my assistant was on the line with Calvin Klein. Golly, I usually shop at Sears.

If you're going to take care of your kids and pay for your house and do something good for adults, you have to do something on television now.

I always wanted to play a lawyer.