If you measure your happiness by the amount of liquid you have in your glass, you are either a cliché or an alcoholic.

Love is pretty much a decision anyway. Just like happiness. You can decide to either love someone or not, be happy or not. The rest is just commitment to the idea.

When a girl says, 'I can't believe I'm doing this!' just know that she had it planned from the minute she shaved

You need a little bit of the crazy to keep things fun.

Believing there's no such thing as luck is very unlucky. Like, the worst. Beyond stealing someone's lucky four-leaf clover.

Wendy warmed my heart, earned my trust, touched my soul, and then touched me in a lot of other places. And right after we'd slept together for the very first time she looked up at me with her chocolate-brown, trustworthy doe eyes and said, "I've got herpes. I thought you should know.

People can be taught to hate. And people can be taught to spell. But apparently, it's one or the other.