you can have one of mine," he says. "i'll yank one out right now." no, that won't count. It has to be the lash that naturally falls out. " He gets on his knees and starts looking for my lash.

People can be taught to hate. And people can be taught to spell. But apparently, it's one or the other.

You need a little bit of the crazy to keep things fun.

People often say that writing is ten percent inspiration and ninety percent perspiration. This is nonsense, of course. It's pretty much one hundred percent caffeine.

Someone once said, People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. They forgot one other option: Some people come only to give us their contact information, let us know that we really need to get together sometime, and why don’t we give them a call?

Dating is like pushing your tray along in a cafeteria. Nothing looks good, but you know you have to pick something by the time you reach the cashier.

If you have a good date, it's nice to text them afterward to say "thanks." But if they were totally lame, it's fun to text "unsubscribe."