A lot of people like snow. I find it to be an unnecessary freezing of water.

When you denigrate people, they have two ways to fight back - with their fists and guns, or their mouths. And mouths are seemingly the easiest way to not get hit back. If people are laughing, they're not going to hit you.

I write books that way - I put a first line down and say, "Where does this go?"

I am an atheist. I have a very different take on who God is. Man invented God because he needed him. God is us.

Id like to acknowledge three people who early on knew Mel Brooks was one of the funniest people in the world: Sid Caesar, me, and Mel Brooks.

A fellow who has a funny bone can learn to hone his skills, but I don't think you can develop a funny bone - you either have it or you don't. And by the way - when you get it, we don't know it.

I'm a charming coward; I fight with words.