I would've asked him to bring a shovel and come to help me dig a body up. That was what a boyfriend should do, right?" -Sookie Stackhouse

Eric, what are you doing?" "Snuggling." "Get out of my bed!" -Sookie Stackhouse, Eric Northman

You've reached Fantasia, where the undead live again every night," "For bar hours, press one. To make a party reservation, press two. To talk to alive person or a dead vampire, press three. Or, if you were intending to leave a humorous prank message on our answering machine, know this: we will find you.

Do I look like I have anything ?" I asked him, in a reasonable voice. He looked as unnerved as the nurse had. He said, "Sorry," and backed away. I took a step after him. I screamed, "I HAVE NOTHING!" And then I said, in a perfectly calm voice, "See, I never had anything to start with.

I’d always enjoyed life, and I knew I would again. But I was going to have to slog through a lot of bad patches to get there

Jason's favorite person in the entire universe was Jason Stackhouse.

Don’t go looking for trouble; it’s already looking for you.