Vampires should never say Uh-Oh!!

You might have been paid back enough to suit you" I said, "but I don't know if you've been paid back enough to suit me.

I felt like a car that had only been operated by one driver… a car its new prospective buyer was determined to take to the Daytona 500.

Men! Dead or alive, they could be exactly the same.

I held on to my better nature by my fingernails but I held on.

So you want me to go to a human orgy, where I will not be welcome, and you want us to leave before I get to enjoy myself? ~Eric Northman

We followed the bondage Bobbsey Twins across the crowded dance floor. Those leather shorts were an adventure from behind, let me tell you. And the pictures of Elvis decorating the walls were an education, too. It wasn’t often you ran into a bondage/Elvis/ whorehouse-themed vampire club.