this time has finished me.

If you let them kill you, they will

But she projected vitality - you knew that she was there.

...maybe a damned good night's sleep will bring me back to a gentle sanity. But at the moment, I look about this room and, like myself, it's all in disarray: things fallen out of place, cluttered, jumbled, lost, knocked over and I can't put it straight, don't want to. Perhaps living through these petty days will get us ready for the dangerous ones.

they thought I had guts they were wrong I was only frightened of more important things

A man who can beat the horses can do anything he makes up his mind to do.

Those who escape hell however never talk about it and nothing much bothers them after that