Presents, I often say, endear absents.

The human species, according to the best theory I can form of it, is composed of two distinct races, the men who borrow and the men who lend.

The vices of some men are magnificent.

The good things of life are not to be had singly, but come to us with a mixture; like a school-boy's holiday, with a task affixed to the tail of it.

Be not frightened at the hard words "imposition," "imposture;" give and ask no questions. Cast thy bread upon the waters. Some have, unawares, entertained angels.

I never knew an enemy to puns who was not an ill-natured man.

May my last breath be drawn through a pipe, and exhaled in a jest.