Lots of ambitious work by young artists ends up in a dumpster after its warehouse debut. So an unknown artist's big glass vitrine holding a rotting cow's head covered by maggots and swarms of buzzing flies may be pretty unsellable. Until the artist becomes a star. Then he can sell anything he touches .

Many people cycle or swim to keep trim. But if swimming is so good for the figure, how do you explain whales?

I primarily buy art to show it off.

Artists need a lot of collectors, all kinds of collectors, buying their art.

I liked working in advertising, but don't believe my taste in art, such as it is, was entirely formed by TV commercials. And I don't feel especially conflicted enjoying a Mantegna one day, a Carl Andre the next day and a brash student work the next.

I don't buy art in order to leave a mark or to be remembered; clutching at immortality is of zero interest to anyone sane.

The art critics on some of Britain's newspapers could as easily have been assigned gardening or travel, and been cheerfully employed for life.