To Grandma, for being my first editor and giving me the best writing advice I’ve ever received: “Christopher, I think you should wait until you’re done with elementary school before worrying about being a failed writer.

There's no solution to life, there's going to be problems no matter what.

I was very tiny...I spent most of my time stuffed into lockers. Thank god for cell phones, or I'd still be there.

Villains are mostly just people villainized by circumstance

I just downloaded the new Alvin and the Chipmunks album! They're the only guys that make music in my key!

You'd think after thousands of years on this planet the human race would have released some kind of handbook for teenagers, telling them how to get through teenagehood and get help for their issues. Yet here we are, struggling through it in our own ways.

I was made fun of a lot in high school because of the way I sound and the way I was.