The most interesting persons are always those who have nothing special to do: children, nurses, policemen and actors at 11 o'clock in the morning.

The unluckiest insolvent in the world is the man whose expenditure of speech is too great for his income of ideas.

I had a million questions to ask God: but when I met Him, they all fled my mind; and it didn't seem to matter.

Any man worth his salt has by the time he is forty-five accumulated a crown of thorns, and the problem is to learn to wear it over one ear.

The censure of a dog is something no man can stand.

New York, the nation's thyroid gland.

My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.