Maybe it's just a daughter's job to piss off her mother.

Leonardo's Mona Lisa is just a thousand thousand smears of paint. Michelangelo's David is just a million hits with a hammer. We're all of us a million bits put together the right way.

Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism.

Our purest form of joy comes when people we envy get hurt. That most genuine form of joy.

Just for the record, she still loves you. She wouldn't bother to torture you if she didn't.

Women are already born so far ahead ability-wise. The day men can give birth, that's when we can start talking about equal rights.

My theory is that church used to be that place. Instead of being a place where you went to look good, it was a place where you could risk going every week to look your worst.