If you take my stuff apart, you'll find my choruses of repetitions are picked up almost verbatim from Kurt Vonnegut, and my distanced fracture quality is all from Amy Hempel, who's probably my favourite writer.

you're doomed at being you.

Somehow it seems wrong to photograph a blind person. It’s like stealing something valuable they don’t even know they own.

Where every day doesn't start with an alarm clock and end with the television.

With my eyes closed, I ask if she knows how this will all turn out. "Long-term or short-term?" she asks. Both. "Long-term," she says, "we're all going to die. Then our bodies will rot. No surprise there. Short-term, we're going to live happily ever after." Really? "Really," she says. "So don't sweat it.

I figure if Eve could get us into this mess, I could get us out. After all, God really likes to see a go-getter.

You can tell a more over-the-top incredible story if you use a nonfiction form.