Disco dancing is just the steady thump of a giant moron knocking in an endless nail.

Delivering the State of the Union? That bloke couldn't deliver pizza.

Little books are the things to write at my age, I've decided. Avoid the big ones, go for the little ones.

She was good at playing abstract confusion in the same way that a midget is good at being short.

Being young is wonderful. But one of the secrets of being a human individual - a mature human individual shall we put it rather grandly - is that you can see this desire in perspective.

My wife and I just started listening to the late Beethoven Quartets together, an activity I recommend for all married couples, but that doesn't really mean that I'm finished reading.

The British secret service was staffed at one point almost entirely by alcoholic homosexuals working for the KGB