I have an abacus at home.

Mitt Romney is saying his comments about liking to fire people were taken out of context. Yeah, what he actually said was he likes to set poor people on fire.

Jeb Bush is getting his presidential campaign in gear. Last week he said he supports a path to citizenship for immigrants. He said, 'I believe in an America where hard work and dedication can lead to any job that your brother and dad once had.'

Time magazine has selected their person of the year. Guess what, it's President-elect Barack Obama. Yeah, ironically, Ebony magazine announced their person of the year, and it's Ed Begley Jr.

A Saudi Arabian prince has said that oil may never again rise above $100 a barrel. He said it's gotten so bad he can't afford to buy his wife her own car that she's not allowed to drive.

The New Oxford Dictionary has declared Sarah Palin's word 'refudiate' to be the 2010 Word of the Year. Palin was honored and said she would do her best to 'dismangle' the English language.

The British government has urged its citizens to abstain from alcohol at least two days a week. Or to make it easier to remember, whenever they brush their teeth.