I have gone into town to buy a few last things we need for the expedition: Peruvian wasp repellent, toothbrushes, canned peaches, and a fireproof canoe. It will take a while to find the peaches, so don't expect me back until dinnertime. Stephano, Gustav's replacement, will arrive today by taxi. Please make him feel welcome. As you know, it is only two days until the expedition, so please work very hard today. Your giddy uncle, Monty
Daniel HandlerBoredom is not black licorice, Snicket," she said. "There's no reason to share it with me.
Daniel HandlerCount Olaf certainly does sound evil. Imagine forcing children to stand near a stove!
Daniel HandlerWhy not rise from the grave and terrorize a little instead of staying buried and dead in the cemetery?
Daniel HandlerIn most cases, the best strategy for a job interview is to be fairly honest, because the worst thing that can happen is that you won't get the job and will spend the rest of your life foraging for food in the wilderness and seeking shelter underneath a tree or the awning of a bowling alley that has gone out of business.
Daniel Handler